Category: Psychology

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  • Key Tips When Getting Divorced

    Key Tips When Getting Divorced

    Ordinarily, nobody ever gets into a relationship with the idea that one day it might just not work out. As a result, it can be very hard to think ahead and plan around something like a divorce befalling the relationship. We do have to be realistic though and perhaps take a proactive approach to planning for the playing-out of the relationship, but chances are if you’re reading this right now you perhaps want some actionable tips to implement in the midst of an ongoing divorce.

    Get in a ‘soft mediator’

    A marriage is a legally binding contract which will require professional legal intervention to end officially. Additionally, making the decision to get a divorce is not always easy. However, one way to ensure that your divorce proceeds as smoothly as possible is by reaching out to an experienced family law firm in your local area. For example, divorcing couples living in West Yorkshire can find plenty of helpful legal resources on the website for Eatons Solicitors. Above all, always try to research a few different family law firms in your area to ensure that you will be working with someone who understands the workings of your local courts.

    That is not all though. When separating it soon becomes apparent that it’s not just legal experts in the form of a divorce lawyer you’ll be dealing with, as sometimes the need to very quickly learn how to get unemployment benefits becomes apparent as one of the many pressing matters to have to deal with. It won’t help anybody to sugar-coat what can be the administrative nightmare that lies ahead during a divorce.

    This is why it’s important to get adequate support, beyond the professional realms. Get a mediator to help with the softer side of proceedings – a so-called ‘soft’ mediator. This would be someone who is close to the both of you and who is likely to maintain neutrality in dealing with the issues you’ll both have as part of the process, but at the same time it would have to be someone who is realistic about all the implications. Sometimes all you need is someone to talk to – a familiar reference point for both parties.

    However, it is important to seek professional advice during these times. If you are opting for a divorce, along with your lawyer always hire any QDRO (Qualified domestic relations order) attorneys like Carla McKain in order to prevent financial losses regarding retirement monies. Keep your financial, mental, and physical health as your first priority. And in the process, a mediator would help you ease your struggle.

    Pre-establish ideal separation terms together

    Emotions could be running sky-high, depending on the circumstances around which the divorce is playing out, but at some point some calm will need to be exercised in dealing with the reality. Pre-establishing each of your ideal separation terms prior to consulting a legal professional will save you a lot of time, headaches and inevitably money, so work together on this.

    There will have to be a lot of compromise, naturally, but be firm about what you want or need as well, because you may just need to fight for the justice you feel you deserve. Be reasonable…

    Help each other progress after the divorce

    As much as there may be some bitterness surrounding the official split, being civil will ultimately benefit the both of you. If there is any way you can help your soon-to-be ex-partner survive and even thrive post-divorce, you shouldn’t hesitate to lend a hand. Write up a recommendation or motivation which might help them benefit from their Oklahoma unemployment claims, for instance.

    Try to part as friends

    Lastly try to part as friends. However it is that the relationship ended, your lives will always be inextricably linked, especially if there are kids involved, but even if there aren’t any. Try to make the other party jump on board with you to see the ultimately failed relationship as an opportunity to establish a great friendship at best.

  • Philosophy of Happiness: Hedonism versus purpose?

    Philosophy of Happiness: Hedonism versus purpose?

    The pursuit of happiness is a long and winding path, often fraught with questions, options and a constant compulsion of evaluation or questioning. In recent years, this has been a hot topic to investigate with books, articles and studies devoted to the subject to quantify this seemingly elusive notion of inner fulfilment. Many social and cultural philosophies of wellness and healthy living offer their guidelines to navigate the topic, but always endorse happiness and its value.

    Happiness creates a non-algorithmic duality of individualistic pursuit, inherently freeing, personally definable, yet coupled with a deep human need of social factors such as; inclusion, security and of course, relationships.

    People define and look for happiness in a variety of ways; some may decide to travel the world on a quest of discovery, others may look for new relationships to nourish their soul, some might go on lavish spending sprees and many may be unsure of how to actually achieve or define happiness. Many people find that life coaching helps with their personal development, hence the popularity of coaches these days.

    Something that brings one person unbounded elation, may indeed provide others with overwhelming anxiety. So, join this quest to discover if Happiness is a state of mind, or something that can indeed be enhanced by external factors such as money and the material world.

    Epicurus, Aristotle or Both?

    Greek Mythology communicated two main perspectives on a life of fulfilment. Epicurus said that a happy life is one of the short term high, instantaneous gratification and hedonistic pursuits, endorsing a world of pleasure and adrenaline.

    Aristotle, on the other hand, said that a life of genuine contentment is routed in virtuous activities, that are fundamentally purposeful. Social contribution therefore equates to true eudemonia.

    In 2011 the United Nations passed ‘the Happiness Resolution’ asking all countries of the world to focus more on Wellbeing to improve quality of life. Bhutan fundamentally embrace the Gross National Happiness index which focuses on wellbeing rather than on Gross Domestic Profit (GDP).

    Money has its place in creating our happiness, according to Meik Wiking of the University of Copenhagen’s ‘Happiness Research Institute’. In fact, Meik says ‘if money and happiness were to describe their relationship on Facebook, it would read; its complicated’. He talks about a range of factors that contribute to the bigger picture, including; money, health, freedom, trust, kindness and relationships.

    In richer countries, people are happier, but that is not to say there is a direct correlation between a healthy mind and a healthy Bitcoin balance. Or is there? People nowadays are looking to make money in new and different ways, for instance, they want to know welche kryptowährung kaufen 2021 (which cryptocurrency to buy), so they can get a better start. Is it buying happiness?

    Moreover, the connection is likely to be related to unhappiness directly associated with the lack of money. As Meik states in his book ‘The Little Book of Lykke; the Danish search for the World’s Happiest People’ ‘when money means that we can put food on the table, have a roof over our head and support our children, money has the power to turn misery into happiness’.

    Objectivity seems to naturally flow through my Libran persona and I therefore cannot resist to mention that many theorists say that truly sustained happiness derives from both Hedonistic and Purposeful actions. In the words of the great Dr Tim Houlding: ‘Find a balance that works knowing that everything changes’. Both Epicurus and Aristotle were right.

    Pro – Social Spending

    Financial gain does not always have to remain in the depths of Hedonistic living, with seemingly empty, short term gratification. With winnings and financial accumulation, comes a certain excitement and inherent responsibility, relating not only to which materials goods can be purchased, but what experiences can be enjoyed, and societal change can take place.

    Leaning slightly towards Aristotle’s eudemonia perspective we learn that experiences are more likely to make us happy, as they feed our sense of identity and purpose. So, take that trip, book that retreat, do that course and use the winnings to enhance your life!

    These purchases bring us closer to other people, which according to the Japanese philosophy ‘Ikigai’ is a major factor in living a healthy and happy life. In their book ‘Ikigai; the Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life’ Hector Garcia and Francesc Miralles discuss the premise of this culturally anthropological outlook which encompasses understanding yourself, your passion, mission, vocation and indeed profession.

    Thankfully money cannot directly ‘purchase’ these things, but spent carefully, can indeed give us the opportunity to search for greater meaning in life, rather than being caught in the tediousness of a financially deficient existence.

    Money provides Choice, Freedom and Progression

    Money certainly doesn’t buy happiness and I advocate this notion. There are some financially ‘rich’ people who are totally miserable and those with the smallest of bank balances who exude a delightfully carefree disposition.

    However, money can offer several secondary benefits beyond the realms of that Miami Blue Porsche 911 Targa; a debt free life, reduction of daily stress and financial confidence.

    Education offers a profound route to self-development, career enhancement and personal enquiry. Whether you’re a kinaesthetic, auditory or visual learner, gathering knowledge about the world we live in and making your contribution is a gift. Use some of your finances to explore and indulge your educational curiosities. Find a tutor that gels with the way you learn, then grow with their style.

    If something brings you pleasure and you wish to indulge yourself with some retail therapy, go and enjoy it! The key, however, for sustaining those initial endorphins are within turning your newfound wealth into something that involves lasting emotional prosperity. Using your financial fortune for the short term and long-term quality of life. Invest in yourself, in society and those you love. A truly fulfilling life is rich with people, love, relationships, family, creativity, hope, social interaction, kindness, physical activity, healthy diets, secure abodes, freedom to travel, education and many other factors. Finances can and will contribute to a number of these factors; spend wisely, live fully and share unconditionally, for a happy and fulfilling life.

    About the author

    David Bailey-Lauring is a single father of three boys so he knows what it takes to stretch a budget when it comes to family finances! David is a content writer and regularly writes about sport, fitness, education and lifestyle in the UK, USA, and Europe.

  • Here Is What You Need To Know About Student Loans

    Here Is What You Need To Know About Student Loans

    Everyone knows how hard paying for college or university can be in this day and age. In a world where all prices are on an exponential increase, it can be hard for parents to provide their children with quality education. While some parents keep a fund for their child’s further education separately from the day they are born, others tend to go with the flow, which could restrict them from paying at the right time. Whatever the case may be, it is crucial to know that getting a quality education is one of the basic rights of every human being. (more…)

  • Rediscovering the Value of the Internet with Online Advice Portals

    Rediscovering the Value of the Internet with Online Advice Portals

    The same can definitely be said about something like planning a trip somewhere, planning to make a purchase of some product or service (no matter how big or small the purchase it), or in fact just looking for some information with which to back-up a case you’re making in an argument, that being how the very first thing you probably do is jump online to run a search-engine query. Many of us have no doubt looked at things like astrea internet plans to make sure that, when it comes to the internet, we’ll be able to get our answers quickly thanks to a great connection speed. I mean “Googling” something is a legitimate verb now, isn’t it and many of us simply cannot imagine our lives without it, even though we perhaps take it for granted? (more…)

  • The Effectiveness of Online Counseling in Practice

    The Effectiveness of Online Counseling in Practice

    The cliché that life is simply not fair may have actually rung true for as long as life itself has existed, but if we think about it from the point of view of contemporary life then it has perhaps never been truer. Case in point – if you just go about your daily business of perhaps watching some entertainment through the media or even the news for goodness’ sake, part of the programming is aimed at selling you something which suggests that your life as it is, isn’t and perhaps never will be good enough, unless you buy this or that product or service. (more…)

  • Saving Time with Online Therapy

    Saving Time with Online Therapy

    There is no doubt about the fact that we live extremely busy lives today, with the amount of expectation placed on the shoulders of the average person in this day and age proving to be a lot greater than what it might have been. We’re having to work harder than the average person needed to just a few short decades ago, just so that we can come close to enjoying the kind of life they enjoyed. (more…)

  • How Getting A Dog Can Help  Your Mental Health

    How Getting A Dog Can Help Your Mental Health

    There are an astonishing 90 million dogs in households in the US and research into people who have a pet dog have been linked with a vast amount of positive effects. From improving your mood, social life and even help improve severe depression and anxiety, a dog can be very comforting and provide a vast enhancement in your life. (more…)

  • Honesty the best policy for my new TV role

    Honesty the best policy for my new TV role

    In life you need to keep motivating and challenging yourself. Throughout my career, no one challenged me more than Richard Johnson did on a daily basis. It’s for that reason that I really hope that Richard becomes champion jockey this season. (more…)

  • Taking the anxiety out of combat

    Taking the anxiety out of combat

    You can train soldiers to be fit for the physical demands of battle, but can you also train them to be “psychologically fit”? Controversially, the American military has decided that you can. (more…)